What could have happened without Gard's chamber lockdown

During the debate on the constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage and civil unions, Rep. John Gard (R-Sun Prairie) locked down the chamber to keep gay activists from getting too close to the floor. I've uncovered the secret list of things Gard and other Republicans were afraid might happen if the gay activists got too close to the floor of the Assembly and made some changes in floor operations:

-References to village people no longer about people in Roberts, Winter, Glenbeulah or other smaller communities in Wisconsin.

-Instead of sitting Republicans on one side of the Assembly Chamber and Democrats on the other, the assemblyfolks are forced to sit girls on one side and boys sitting on the other -- and some secretly like the new seating arrangement.

-Numbers of speeches dramatically declines on mandatory leather pants Tuesdays as many assemblypeople are a little shy about the new look.

-Music from ABBA piped into the chamber reveals there are indeed a few secret dancing queens in the assembly chamber and they are not the gay activists.

-Gard finds a note on his desk that starts "To John Foo, thanks for everything" and asks about a road trip.

-When a staffer sends out an email saying the next floor session is going to be a drag, some assemblymen gets confused and show up with their feather boas.

-Activist bring back Senator Tim Carpenter to be in the Assembly.